If a patient’s friend runs into the operating room and yells at you, you have to stop.

The episode’s title comes from the one and only Frank Rossitano, who Liz discovers peeing into jars he keeps around his office. She thought it was sun tea. Some of it was. 

When I read Tina Fey’s article in “The New Yorker,” “Lessons in Late Night,” I learned this was drawn right from SNL (this may have also been in her book, but I’m too lazy to go check):

Here’s the truth: There is an actual difference between male and female comedy writers, and I’m going to reveal it now. The men urinate in cups. And sometimes jars. One of the first times I walked into the office of my old boss Steve Higgins, he was eating an apple and smoking a cigarette simultaneously. (When I started at “S.N.L.,” you could still smoke in an office building. I might not be young.) I had been there only a few weeks, and Steve had been very encouraging and supportive. I forget what we were talking about, but I went to get a reference book off a high shelf in his office. When I reached to move a paper cup that was in front of it, Steve jumped up. “Don’t touch that,” he said. “Hang on.” He grabbed the cup, and a couple of others like it around the office, and took them out of the room to dump them.

“Oh, yeah, that’s pee in those cups,” my friend Paula Pell later informed me. [Editor’s Note: Paula plays Pete’s wife, Paula!] I could not believe it…

I told a male co-worker about what I had seen. Was it not the grossest thing he had ever heard? He answered matter-of-factly that he occasionally did it, too. He said it was just something guys did when they were too lazy to go to the bathroom. The bathroom, I should point out, was about as far away as you are from this magazine. I started to feel as if I were from space.

I called my boyfriend, Jeff, back in Chicago. “You grew up way out in the country with a bunch of brothers. Did you ever pee in cups and, like, leave them around?” Jeff was incredulous. “What! No. That’s disgusting.” A thousand points for Jeff.

Once I became aware of this practice, I started noticing cups in other places. In the “Weekend Update” offices—which were like the smarter but meaner older brother of the regular writers’ offices—there weren’t any cups. There was a jar. It was a jar of piss with a lid on it, and, judging by its consistency, I suspect that the writers sometimes spat into it. Or that one of them was terribly ill. You could see it when you came in the door, backlit by the afternoon sun, and at first I thought it was a test. If you saw the piss jar and dared to ignore it and continue into the room, you were welcomed. “Welcomed” is too strong a word. You were . . . one of the guys? Nope, you know what? I’m just projecting. It couldn’t have been a test, because they really didn’t give a fuck whether you came into the room or not.

Not all the men at “S.N.L.” whizzed in cups. But four or five out of twenty did, so the men have to own that one. Anytime there’s a bad female standup somewhere, some idiot Interblogger will deduce that “women aren’t funny.” Using that same math, I can deduce that male comedy writers piss in cups.

That back story only makes an already rich episode even better.

Our three plots:

1) Liz’s apartment is converting to condos, and she wants the one above hers so she can make a duplex. When she goes to bribe the guy, she pretends to be a hipster to win him over, but instead he asks her to move in with him, since he won’t be able to afford the rent hike. She then tries to get him to move out using drama (Jenna’s idea) and a black guy (Tracy’s idea). But the gay hipster cop takes it all until she uses the Frank method and pees in a vase.

2) Don Geiss’ family is dragging him through the mud, so Jack decides to get a vasectomy so he never has kids. Tracy joins him, since Bill Cosby lied to him and being a dad isn’t fun. But his surgery-induced fever dream makes Tracy realize he wants a daughter, and reading Tracy Jr.’s touching poem makes Jack want kids too.

Well, it’s mostly touching until you get to the end:

Screenshot 2014-09-08 21.21.30

3. Tracy is trying to make TGS more eco-friendly. Apparently Frank is the most green person at TGS because he eats garbage and uses the pee to fertilize plants (which I thought was fake but apparently isn’t. “Wish you could feritilize crops with pee? Urine luck” is headline of the year). Then Al Gore shows up again! This time, he stresses that we don’t just need individuals making small changes, but legislative action, to change the environment.

He tells Kenneth, “Recycle everything, including jokes,” and then does just that, exiting the same way he did last time:

Screenshot 2014-09-08 21.22.42

Kenneth also has these really amazing NBC themed pamphlets which give us a wonderful glimpse into 2009. First, a Minka Kelly one:

Screenshot 2014-09-08 21.09.41 Screenshot 2014-09-08 21.09.49 Screenshot 2014-09-08 21.09.57

#TeamFridayNightLights #forever

And then a “Heroes” one:

Screenshot 2014-09-08 21.17.25

Bits & Pieces

This episode opens with one of my least favorite “Orange Is The New Black” characters:

Screenshot 2014-09-08 21.00.01

No one wants you here Fig.

Best Frank Hat: Shark Cop. This is great in retrospect, because he was in “Sharknado 2.”

Tracy as Bill Cosby is precious.

Screenshot 2014-09-08 21.14.40

 

Perhaps my favorite Jenna line ever was uttered this episode: “Drama is like gay man Gatorade. It replenishes their electrolytes.”

Kathy Geiss’s lawyer:

Screenshot 2014-09-08 21.03.26

 

#TeamKathy

THIS EPISODE IS THE FIRST NON-APPEARANCE OF ASTRONAUT MIKE DEXTER.

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